20 Warning Signs of an Emotionally Abusive Relationship


The most dangerous relationship you can get in is where you are abused either emotionally or, even worse, physically. Being in such a relationship can have a negative impact on your self-esteem. What is even more dangerous is that sometimes people don’t even realize that they are involved in an abusive relationship. Physically abusive relationship can be spotted quite fast as there are actual abusive signs on a person, whereas emotionally abusive relationship can be hard to notice.

Studies have shown that emotionally abusive relationships do the same harm to a person as physically abusive ones. Why it is so harmful? First of all, such relationships change the way we look at ourselves. People behave with us negatively and in a long run we start to believe that we deserve to be treated this way as we are bad people because why then people would abuse us?

A person who emotionally abuses another does it in order to be in total control. He seeks to control the relationship by humiliating his other half using bad words or constant shouting. A person who suffers from emotional abuse is left confused, scared and depressed.

Although some people may believe that men are bigger abusers than women, it has been proven that both of them abuse each other’s partners at a similar percentage. And it can happen to anyone.

In order to find out whether you are involved in an emotionally abusive relationship, below are mentioned the main things which your partner tends to do.

  1. Your partner often humiliates you when you are with others.
  2. He criticizes everything you do and it makes you feel as if you can’t do anything right.
  3. He tells jokes which make you feel worthless.
  4. He wants to control your behavior and everything related to you – what you wear, how you look and what you do.
  5. He often reminds you your weakest abilities.
  6. He doesn’t consider your feelings and tells you that you are being too emotional and sensitive.
  7. He looks at you in a way which is uncomfortable to you. It can go to as far as you being afraid when you are only with him in a room.
  8. He punishes you by not showing affection to you.
  9. He tells that your accomplishments and dreams are nonsense.
  10. He tells your secrets to everyone around you, especially in front of you.
  11. He doesn’t think that you know what you deserve.
  12. He makes you feel guilty for his own mood swings and mistakes.
  13. He gets offended when you or others laugh at him.
  14. He doesn’t let you be with your friends or do something interesting or fun with them.
  15. He makes you feel grateful in a relationship with him as there are many others who would like to be with him.
  16. He makes himself look right all the time.
  17. He threatens you in a way which you have to understand as helping you.
  18. He takes care of your financial situation so that you wouldn’t spend money on things he thinks are not needed for you although they are really necessary to you.
  19. He always texts or calls you to know what you are doing or with who you are when he is not around you.
  20. He makes you take blame for things which you didn’t do in order to prove that you love him.

You should carefully analyze if there are any of these signs in your relationship. Of course, if these signs happened only once, it doesn’t necessarily mean that you are in danger as we all have our on and off days. But if they become too constant, you should consider if it is worth being with such a person who doesn’t treat you right.

Emotionally abusive people make us feel that we are lucky to be in a relationship with them. We have to do everything they want to do in order to prove our love for them. We can’t behave how we want and it hurts our identities.

However, you should never blame yourself for the way people treat you. If you are kind, others should treat you kindly, as well. You should never settle for anything less than you are worth. You should never choose to be with a wrong person so you won’t be single all the time. It is better to be by yourself than with someone who makes you feel scared.

Being involved in an emotionally abusive relationship can harm your overall well-being. If you recognize a majority of the signs mentioned above, don’t be afraid to search for help. Remember that it is for your own good. Also, it can be quite hard to see these signs in our own relationships, thus, it is important to have friends who can see your relationship from another side and evaluate it objectively.

You should pay attention to these signs because emotionally abusive relationships can easily transform into a physical abusive ones.


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